The New Portrait

Earlier this year, when trying to take a new portrait of myself, I took more than 300 frames before I'd admit defeat. When I finally did, it was the kind of defeat that generally involves casualties, the ceding of hard-won land, and hari-kiri.

I figured I'd never take another good picture again. Looking the way I do, surely there couldn't be more than twelve or fifteen good pictures in me for my whole life. Currently, I'm in possession of about nine.

It took Mr. Barr about five frames to nail the picture you see attached to my profile here. And he's not even a photographer. I mean, I hadda show him how to hold the camera and everything.

Because he didn't have a grip (hee hee) there's a slight blur; even this error served to camouflage my enormous pores. Nevertheless, the shot is good. As soon as I saw it I called a halt to the photo shoot.

Partly, I was just so excited to see something usable I didn't tempt Fate by being greedy. Plus the light was failing faster than my resolve. I was relieved, and more than a bit gobsmacked, by the result.

Of course, it is a very good likeness, inasmuch as it was posed for maximum effect.

For one thing, it's not face on. For another, the light was just right - bright shade. Although I tweaked it a bit in iPhoto I didn't airbrush anything out or resort to any such high-tech trickery. I was just lucky I guess that when the shutter opened I was sucking in what needed to be sucked in and sticking out what needed to be stuck out.

Of course, they say nobody likes their own photographs, or the sound of their own voice, or to watch themselves on film. Why so many people become actors and singers I'll never know. I would already be famous today if I knew how they did it.

As it is, the time has come to increase the scope of my activities. Which means more photographs of myself, having to listen to and watch myself over and over while editing. Oh goody...